Have You Ever............

[Betaman]

Have You Ever......

Spent the day prior to a trial practicing and rode like a champ and at the trial the next day, rode like a retarded chook with vertigo.

Spent the day prior to a trial practicing and rode like a retarded chook with vertigo and at the trial the next day, rode like a retarded chook with vertigo.

Spent Friday night at the pub with your mates, Saturday night at the pub with your mates and part of Sunday morning as well and at the trial rode pretty well considering...................

Got a flat on the way to a trial, got a flat at the trial, and just to add insult to injury, got a flat on the way home as well. All things considered a very good day......if you're the local tyre shop.

On the way to an event, hit a.......roo
cow
small tree
wheelie bin(jeez that was messy)
all of the above

On the way to an event hit a 1974 Valiant.......Valiant drives off with virtually nil damage............meanwhile your car is profusely leaking water, oil and its front end is totallly written off....

Had a sensational start to an event and then broken the nipple off your fuel tap.....and you didn't even crash.

Sheared a flywheel key just before you've clawed your way to the very top of an unbelievably steep climb that was nearly vertical. Your bike then proceeds to cartwheel spectacularly to the bottom. The only thing that stops it from completely breaking in two at the bottom of this mini Mt Everest is your body(In particular, your head)

And speaking of that @#$%& Valiant, while waiting for a tow......we were stuck miles from nowhere in dead flat country and nothing decent to ride over.

Severerly crashed your brains out just riding between the sections.....never mind the sections themselves you haven't even got that far yet.

Prepped your bike to the max, practiced like a demon, got to the event(State Title) with the best preparation of your life...............and left your helmet at home.

Run over an observer.

Run over an observer and pinned them against a tree.

Slept with your bike.....and your wife in another room.

Spent all day practicing a really tricky new technique that's causing you no end of problems only to have your kid trundle down on his $5 bike he bought at a clearing sale and casually do it perfectly first pop......while picking his nose at the same time.

Bought a new bike which immediately improves your riding only to find that the bloke who beat you for 1st place at the last trial has also bought a new bike.....Unfortunately at the nect trial you discover that the status quo has been maintained.

Choked.........you and Port Power have a lot in common.

Missed the birth of some of your children due to a trial being on.

Come back from rider briefing to find your oldest offspring has buggered off on his bicycle wearing YOUR helmet. Your other darling child has disapeared in the other direction with YOUR gloves. Meanwhile while your are retrieving your property, you get back to the pits to discover that all your 3/8th drive sockets are missing. You find them when your bike won't start and your 2 year tells you he inserted them in your muffler. Needless to say your first lap is a total disaster.

Got your camelbak hose caught in your handlebar controls.(You try and stay clean while stuck to your handlebars in a totally uncompromising position)

Ridden the A line cos it looked better than the C line.
Ridden the A line cos it looked better than the C line......and cleaned it!!!!!!!!
Ridden the A line and eaten dirt in a very BIG way(see bit about Mt Everest)

Started (and never finished) 'landscaping' the garden just so you have some new obstacles to ride over.

Being too tired to attend family functions but surprisingly getting 100% better overnight
and going to a trial the next morning.

The week after an event, spent more time at the doctors/physio/chiropractor than at work.
............Or not gone to work at all.

Considered yourself fortunate that you chose to marry a registered nurse............the next best thing to marrying the daughter of a trials bike importer.

[kembro]

Funniest thing i've read in ages.

[lewry family]

I'm surprised you still get out of bed in the morning!

In all seriousness.....very funny!!! It's great when, despite all adversity, we can still laugh at ourselves. I think it keeps us sane!

Maree

[motostar99]

HAHA! That was awesome... enjoyed that very much, and I have to say I could tick yes to a few of those things!!

Nic

[Stu]

Gasman that is being put up in my garage. I'm glad it's not only me who visits the Physio and Masseur!

[mudskipper]

Very Funny!!! Made our evening reading this one.....thanks gasgasman !!

[Betaman]

Thanks for the comments guys here's a few more of the most recent ones.....

Have You Ever Part 2..................


Palmed the kids off at the sister in lawsfor the weekend. Done a fantastic job of convincing your wife that she really should go and see her mum, leaving you free to ride
all day with interuptions or impediments. Your clever plan goes awol when 10 minutes after
waving your beloved(wife, not bike) goodbye the sky seriously clouds over and it starts to bucket down. Considering its been a long time since it rained like this, you go out undetered anyway and within another 10 minutes you have tweaked your shoulder and arm and your leg really aches, once again all without crashing. The rest of the day is spent watching the rain and wondering what could have been.

Discovered that new riding gear does not magically give you new riding abilities as well.

Sold 3 complete Yamaha TY250s(an A,B and D) for a measly $100. And you thought nobody rode these overweight evil handling junkboxes anymore.

Wondered what it would be like to ride your hobby farmer next door neighbours property. But this is probably out of the question ever since:
-a semi delivering gear to your place knocked over his strainer post and pretzeled his gate
-the hobby farmer thinks one of your dogs chewed the tail off one of his calves(yeah and pigs fly too....)
-your eldest offspring(the helmet thief) blurted out to his face the name you call this hobby farmer when he's not around.

Built a sensational aluminium enclosed trailer thats waterproof,dustproof and childproof and perfect for transporting bikes. Unfortunately your wife discovers its perfect for storing furniture, clothes, books, baby stuff etc, etc, etc,................

Stepped on a black snake while eyeballing a new potential property for a trial. And 10 minutes later stepped on another black snake( a HUGE one this time...anaconda size)
Note; Must remember to take the kids next time you visit this property.......especially the helmet thief and the socket collector.